okay

created 05-01-2024

this is the first blog post

okay! cool! i've finally got this working. i'll use this as a semi-regular diary or archive or whatever

umm... i finished high school a few months ago, graduating with a reasonably good final ATAR (for non australians, this is a funny number that ranks how well you did in school relative to everyone else in your year group). it was right after an exam-heavy season so i sort of went catatonic for a while and then i went into a bit of existential whiplash after i realised that i had no idea what to do with all of this spare time.

during school, on days where i could get my sludgebrain to focus really well, i'd be rotting away in my chair studying for upwards of 7 hours a day. i tracked all of my progress on this neat little app which graphed my daily stats (i love graphs) and genuinely could not do any work without it. you would not catch me doing Any revision if my study timer wasn't tracking my hours i took more pride in my stats than the process itself lol

so point is. all that heavy study load being suddenly lifted with the conclusion of my high school final exams came rather suddenly and then i found myself in a strange position where i realised that i didn't have any 'real' hobbies anymore because i didn't have any time to do them during school. promptly after i flooded my synapses with cheap short-term dopamine boosts which was NOT swagger but after aerobatically making my phone undergo advanced metaphysical gymnastics i set restrictions that i have been keeping myself accountable too. yippee!

now i'm trying my best to fill this plethora of spare time by doing 'Productive' things or at least activities that i genuinely enjoy and think i can derive meaningful value from as opposed to just doomscrolling for hours at a time.